The MINI Pullman (posted April 1st!)

From MINIUSA PR:

MINI, already known for cornering as if it were on rails, will now offer a special edition that will actually corner on rails. In light of the growing problem of gridlock and rush hour traffic, this special model is adapted to ride on all domestic gauge rail lines throughout North America.

In conjunction with the North American railway system, an exclusive right-of-way has been authorized for the specially equipped MINI to commute via rail during peak hours in major urban centers. This access, once only limited to railway utility trucks is now available to MINI owners who order the special model.

The MINI Pullman can access the railway at any major crossing gate provided care is taken not to enter into the opposing direction of prevailing rail traffic. A new feature in the onboard computer allows the MINI ‘motorman’ or woman to access individual rail line schedules to plan their travels while on the rails.

The MINI Pullman comes fitted with a special wheel package that easily locks onto standard gauge rail thus allowing MINIs to corner on the roads and the rails with equal aplomb. An upgraded dual air-horn warning system comes standard on the model to alert inattentive pedestrians and vehicles as the MINI Pullman enters into crossing gate areas.

To compliment this new model, MINI has created a line of apparel. Items from overalls to hats are available in a fetching grey ticking-stripe pattern. Accessories for the vehicle include a brass roof-mounted bell and a special auxiliary engine exhaust stack that mounts on the bonnet. For four additional passengers, a specially adapted hitch system allows for the MINI Pullman owner to add the accessory Commuter Caboose.

“Access to the national system of underground subway rail is under consideration, once the logistics of accessing the track through individual subway stations can be solved” said national railway spokesperson Lou Komodeff, “We look forward to sharing the rails with MINI as long as they are ‘going our way.”

MINI spokesperson, Hugh Moore said, “MINI has mastered the art of cornering on the roads. Now we can claim that MINIs do literally corner on rails.” MINI has scheduled the first prototype testing on public railways to commence today, April 1st, 2005 :)

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Written By: MF Staff

  • Siddhartha

    Good one! Happy April to you, too!

  • Bob

    Hey Gabe,

    Thanks for posting the story on the new pullman. I just called my MA and placed the order. If all goes well the pullman will be here August 1. The pullman is coming equipped with the german armrest as a standard feature.

    Bob

  • Schwarz Dietmar

    I like those April 1st stories. They’re very refreshing.

  • michael Boice

    Who’s funnier than you! Very creative you are!

  • Milwaukee Liar

    You had me fooled for a minute. Very funny. Ha, Ha, Ha!

  • Milwaukee Liar

    You had me fooled for a minute. Very funny. Ha, Ha, Ha!

  • MCH

    This option does not seem safe. The average individual will be unable to safely determine if the tracks are clear. I think that more research is needed prior to releasing this option. I would estimate that it will take at least a year to safely implement the idea. Perhaps a release date of 4/1/06 or 4/1/07.

  • http://motoringfile.com Gabe

    I can’t take credit for this one.

  • http://www.bancroftsonline.com Sean Bancroft

    This post is at least humorous. The other is just sick. Sick I tell you.

  • RB

    NOT GOING TO GET ME ON THIS ONE.

    But where do I sign up?

  • http://www.bentcrankracing.com Adam Emanoff

    Sweet – where are the pics?

  • http://n/a Casey

    Too bad the interior photos were not also posted on April 1st. I wish those were only an april fools joke :)

  • David

    Can this new equipment be retrofitted to my 04 MMCS?;-)

  • http://dbmini.us db

    so my question is, who is going to be first to market with the cow catcher attachment? Any chance MINI-Fin might pick up on this? :D

  • http://www.jwardell.com/mini/ Josh Wardell

    Will 19% rail pulleys be available?

  • modboi

    Did any of you read the April 1st posting on MINI2 about the workers strike at the Oxford plant because the MINI/BMW execs felt that tea does not reflect well on brand image; therefore, tea was banned from the plant? British and Tea… What a riot… ;)

  • http://motoringfile.com Gabe

    happy April 1st everyone!!!!

  • Gromit
  • http://motoringfile.com Gabe

    Wow.


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