By far, hands down, the most bizarre review of a Bentley, no, wait, an R56 MINI, that I have ever read.

>Your vital male organ. How come it’s only with your vital organ that size doesn’t matter? I mean, no one’s girlfriend ever said, “Of course size doesn’t matter, I don’t care what size the diamond is, or the handbag, the bra, the divorce settlement.” Whatever they say, size always matters.

It’s A A Gill sitting in for Mr. Clarkson on this interview, although I doubt it could be any more cheeky.

>It’s all design gimmicks that aren’t an improvement. Is that a tap or does it turn on the lights? The most annoying feature is the speedometer, the size of a soup plate, as if bigger makes quick faster. There’s another digital speedo behind the wheel – fast, faster and faster still. This is a little motor that wants you to think it’s Kate Moss. A pretty, naughty, goer.

Definitely worth the read. A very entertaining review!

[ MINI Cooper S Review ]